Shelagh Laurie Paulsson (née Hetherington)

Our family are celebrating the life of Shelagh Paulsson who passed away peacefully in hospital on June 12, 2025.

Shelagh was born in Quyon, Quebec where she spent the first two years of her life. Her family then moved to Sudbury, Ontario and lived there until moving to their new home in Hull, Quebec in 1959.

After attending Hull Elementary School for her primary grades, Shelagh enjoyed her high school years at Aylmer High School and then attended Carleton University. While at Carleton, Shelagh met Steve Paulsson who she later married. Shelagh moved to Toronto to live with Steve and became a loving step-mother to Erik. After Shelagh and Steve separated, she returned to Hull to live with her sister, Jo and late brother-in-law, Ron.

Shelagh and Jo lived together for almost 20 years. They supported each other, laughed together, cried together and, like most maternal sisters, also had their fair share of lively disagreements. But at the core of their hearts, they loved each other and always only wanted the best for one another.

Shelagh spent the last few months of her life living at Cumberland Lodge. She often told family about how comfortable she felt there. This was evident when we visited Cumberland Lodge and heard stories from staff and residents about how much they loved Shelagh, how fun she was to talk with and how she always made everyone she met there feel comfortable and welcome.

Shelagh was an accomplished bridge player having represented Canada at many World Bridge Federation tournaments and also at the World Bridge Olympiad in Istanbul in 2004. She also had a passion for reading medieval fiction novels and consistently added to her lifelong collection.

Shelagh leaves behind a loving family in the Ottawa area which she cherished. She enjoyed family get togethers and specifically loved watching her nieces, nephews and all their children play and grow together. She also leaves behind her beloved step-son, Erik (Vancouver) and her ex-husband, Steve Paulsson (Toronto).

Shelagh is predeceased by her mother and father, Margaret & Melville Hetherington and her sister, Ray Peterson. She is survived by her sister, Jo Webb and brother-in-law, Dick Peterson. Shelagh will also be fondly remembered by her cousin, Mary (Doug) Brown and her nieces and nephews, Rob (Kathy) Webb, Christine Hartley (Kalvin Mercer), Kendall (Paul) Brenton, David Peterson (Nikki MacFarlane), Heather (Greg) Dalling and John (Christiane) Peterson. She was also blessed to have many great-nieces and nephews and 5 great-great-nieces/nephew who loved her dearly.

A Celebration of Shelagh’s Life will be held on Saturday, July 12, 2025 at 10:30 am at Glen Cairn United Church, followed by a reception in the church hall. In lieu of flowers, please consider a donation to Cumberland Lodge Retirement Community.

Shelagh’s Eulogy

Good morning. Most of you already know who I am, but for those of you who don’t, my name is Christine and I am and now, always will be Shelagh’s favorite niece LOL. I am here today to help us all better understand and celebrate my Aunt Shelagh.

Shelagh was born in 1951. Now, to put that into perspective, Shelagh was only 8 years old when her first nephew - my brother, Robbi - was born. 10 years old when I (her favorite niece LOL) was born. And 12 years old when my sister Kendall was born. And although she lived with us until she was 17 years old, I don’t remember her being around… I guess because, even then, she was always the quiet unassuming one in our family.

At 17, Shelagh went off to university. Well “off” in that she went across town to Carleton U. She was always proud to say that, at Carleton, she really didn’t learn anything except how to play bridge. And yes, she sure did learn how to play bridge.

Since 1970, Shelagh was a member of the American Contract Bridge League. The ACBL is the largest bridge organization in North America serving over 130,000 members. While a member of this league, Shelagh was a certified teacher and a qualified bridge tournament adjudicator. Before turning her advanced bridge skills into teaching and adjudicating bridge tournaments, Shelagh represented Canada at many World Bridge Federation events across North America. She also represented Canada in the World Bridge Olympiad in Istanbul, Turkey in 2004.

While reading and learning more about Shelagh’s bridge achievements, I learned that, in 1994, Shelagh was nominated as a member of the ACBL’s GoodWill Committee. This committee receives, conveys and acts on suggestions for the betterment of the ACBL, particularly in the areas of active ethics, conduct, tournament conditions, bridge for Juniors and bridge for the handicapped. This was an elite role awarded to Shelagh because of her advanced bridge skills and her commitment to the game.

As Shelagh was winding down her own bridge playing career, she joined the Kate Buckman Bridge Studio in Toronto and OKBridge, both Canadian bridge associations, and began her bridge teaching career in earnest. She told us once that her proudest achievement as a teacher was in reaching the semi-finals of the 1998 Canadian Women’s Team Championship with her dear friend, Elizabeth Redrupp.

I find it truly sad to realize that I - we - knew so little about Shelagh’s achievements in the bridge world. She obviously wasn’t just dabbling in bridge… she had many achievements that could have - and should have - been celebrated. I’m glad that we are able to do this today…

Shelagh was also an avid reader. She loved reading any mystical or fantasy series of books she could get her hands on and often read and re-read them again and again. She used to say that there was nothing like the feeling of holding a good book. She also had a great collection of Buddhas at one point and she’d often joke about how they reminded her of herself.

Shelagh moved to Toronto after she left Carleton to live with her then husband, Steve (more on that later;) and although she was busy there with her new husband and family, Kendall fondly remembers how Shelagh and her would get together weekly for a visit or coffee when Kendall was on maternity leave with Alex. You see, family - even extended family - was very important to Shelagh.

Although Shelagh never had her own maternal children, she met Steve Paulsson while at Carleton University and married him on December 6, 1978. Steve had been previously married and had a young son, Erik, who Shelagh loved as her own. Over the years, Shelagh and Erik had lost touch - we all know how life gets in the way sometime! - but they had recently reconnected. I know Erik considered Shelagh his “other Mom” and Shelagh certainly always considered Erik her “son”.

In fact, when I look back, Shelagh also loved Robbi, Kendall, David, Heather, John and I as if we were her own children that she had never been fortunate enough to have. And when we had children of our own, she loved those children just like they were her own grandchildren. Shelagh was also blessed to have met who she considered her “great grandchildren” Ellie, Aria and Mason. And she was all smiles when I share my first picture of Summer with her and when she learned about Riley’s arrival.

Shelagh lived with my Mom for almost 20 years. They supported each other and loved each other. Oh yes, there were many lively arguments along the way….however, I truly believe this was only because of how much they loved each other and wanted only the best for each other.

Shelagh spent the last few months of her life at Cumberland Lodge. It is sad for me to say, but I feel like she had finally found the place where she was comfortable and felt she “fit in”. I say this because I think Shelagh spent a large part of her life trying to fit into our world. You see Shelagh was happy just being Shelagh, even though we thought she should be someone else…like us…

I asked people for memories to share of Shelagh …. Here’s what I learned but really already knew about her…

• One of Shelagh’s greatest joys was her family dinners at Kendall and Paul’s on Sundays, even though she sometimes couldn’t make it there because she said she was “stinky” LOL
• After Kathy & Robbi’s dog Sky passed away, Shelagh made annual donations to the dog rescue group that Sky was adopted from.
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• After my late husband, Owen, was diagnosed with Parkinson’s Disease, Shelagh made annual donations to the Parkinson’s Research Consortium. She also made regular donations to Glen Cairn United Church and we just learned recently, that she was also making monthly donations to Ovarian Cancer Canada. And Shelagh was always the first to jump in on our family’s Boxing Day gift exchange, even though she was on disability and had limited resources … I remember her being so excited about the “dragonfly” hat clip from Lee Valley Tools that she bought for TK one year - the one that would keep bugs away from him while he was fishing. I remember how she always saved her money during the year and so was able to buy her sister - my Mom - a beautiful Swarovski keepsake because she saw how much my Mom loved buying them for Kendall, Kathy and I at Christmas. And I remember how, even last Christmas, when Shelagh was at Cumberland Lodge and had very limited resources and funds, she still was the first one to jump in and support the family Boxing Day gift exchange and bought me a beautiful hand blown glass hummingbird feeder that has now hung in our backyard since early May. But I think one of the kindest things I remember recently about Shelagh was how she would arrange her own transportation and travel from the far East side of Ottawa to the west end of Ottawa just to visit her sister at Bridlewood Trails. Family definitely was the one thing Shelagh cherished most in her life.
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So here’s what I would like us all to remember about Shelagh….

Although she was different from us in many ways, she was always the one who could see any situation in a positive light without casting any judgement on anyone.

She always only tried to see the best in everyone.

She always looked on the bright side of things.

And she always reassured us that she would be and was okay.

I will remember Shelagh for being strong. For being positive. And for being one of the members of our family who I always knew I could count on to help make sense of things.

I will miss her wisdom. I will miss her comfort. I will definitely miss her smiles.